Serious Why getting a social circle is the most important thing you can do (period)

[ThirdyAughtSix]

If you are reading this and currently are a shut-in I highly advise you to get a social circle. As hard as the prospect can be it is one of the most influential and important things you can do for yourself. If you don't have a social network your life is virtually over. Not only is getting females near impossible or really any sort of sexual interaction for that matter, it also lays the groundwork for the fields and jobs you can get into. Many trades , opportunities, and love interests are determined on the people you interact with on a daily basis. I used to have the mentality that life was simple and easy if you possessed a high enough IQ and intelligence. But I soon learned that no matter how smart you are , you will be treated much differently if you are not in cliques .I genuinely think social circles can override the black pill in some cases, if not most. Its why I think mentalceldom is ulitmately one of the biggest factors determining your inceldom, cause if you fail to establish a large social circle your life is going to be fucking shit. I think even chad could be near inceldom due to his inability to establish a social circle (which is highly unlikely for obvious reasons but I digress) . But basically TLDR : touch grass your life will be infinitely easier than complaining online

 

[Khastle]

The biggest lie being told to young men at the moment is that going out drinking, partying, fucking about with friends, etc, is not productive but staying in the gym and reading old books no one has ever heard of constantly is. Don't get me wrong, working out and reading and whatever else is great for you but the ones actually having fun and making memories alongside grinding are gaining more and having a way more fulfilling life than you are being stuck purely on that grind. All your money, grades, and gains will mean nothing still if you're still going back to your quiet room with no one to share your life with expect 4chan, Discord, and the Mariana Bay.

 

[ThirdyAughtSix]

The biggest lie being told to young men at the moment is that going out drinking, partying, fucking about with friends, etc, is not productive but staying in the gym and reading old books no one has ever heard of constantly is.

I wish I had this mentality in the first place instead of having to learn this shit the hard way. boomer parents gaslit me into believing that being a no life was ok

 

[Malice]

This is harder than it sounds when you're an outcast, regardless of gender. Life is not that simple. Going to the gym and reading old books is the only thing some people can do to better themselves with what they have available to them at any given moment.

 

[clover]

I didn't have much choice and moved states in between finishing high school and starting college. Wish I could've been more prepared for how much that and the pandemic absolutely wrecked my social life. I wish the whole "it's hard to make/keep friends as an adult" message was hammered in way more when I was a kid.

 

[ThirdyAughtSix]

Life is not that simple. Going to the gym and reading old books is the only thing some people can do to better themselves with what they have available to them at any given moment.

Going to the gym and reading old literature will not allow to to establish a social circle , in fact it can be the detriment to you if you take it too far. Reading books will not form connections , going to the gym will most likely not get you any circle either.It will help you mentally , it will help you live longer but it won't help you socially. This thread isn't made for those people because if you already are an outcast at that point its virtually over. Its for the people who have a chance to take but are unable to take the chance due to their own volition , In which its a call to action as I personally had this mentality of "mind over matter". Which simply is not useful in most situation because your life is determined by your social connections.

 

[ThirdyAughtSix]

I didn't have much choice and moved states in between finishing high school and starting college. Wish I could've been more prepared for how much that and the pandemic absolutely wrecked my social life. I wish the whole "it's hard to make/keep friends as an adult" message was hammered in way more when I was a kid.

Im not sure your situation at the moment but I would try to take any opportunity to make your youth worth it .

 

[ThirdyAughtSix]

This is harder than it sounds when you're an outcast, regardless of gender

best advice I have for you if you have autism or ADHD ,is to mask insanely hard . Initially it is going to be the most draining thing in your life , I remember when my masking took a physical toll on my body and I would feel like utter dogshit and physically tired, but eventually my masking got much easier with time and social interaction became less of a burden

 

[AshenMan]

The biggest lie being told to young men at the moment is that going out drinking, partying, fucking about with friends, etc, is not productive but staying in the gym and reading old books no one has ever heard of constantly is. Don't get me wrong, working out and reading and whatever else is great for you but the ones actually having fun and making memories alongside grinding are gaining more and having a way more fulfilling life than you are being stuck purely on that grind. All your money, grades, and gains will mean nothing still if you're still going back to your quiet room with no one to share your life with expect 4chan, Discord, and the Mariana Bay.

Prey of the Gurus

 

[AshenMan]

4chan, Discord, and the Mariana Bay.

>Implying we're as big as those cats lmfao

 

[ignika98]

If you don't have a social network your life is virtually over.

Nice try, Zucc. But I still won't be making a Facebook account.

 

[Tedposter]

This is harder than it sounds when you're an outcast, regardless of gender. Life is not that simple. Going to the gym and reading old books is the only thing some people can do to better themselves with what they have available to them at any given moment.

How going to the gym and reading old books will "help" someone?

 

[jnoj]

How going to the gym and reading old books will "help" someone?

This is harder than it sounds when you're an outcast, regardless of gender. Life is not that simple. Going to the gym and reading old books is the only thing some people can do to better themselves with what they have available to them at any given moment.

While going to the gym is good for your body and reading is good for your spirit and mind, doing these things in isolation will not help you much socially.

The act of consistently appearing in places that others consistently appear in is a great way to begin forming a social group. This first step could be in the form of going to the gym on a consistent basis (same day, same time) and recognizing some of the same people that also go at the same time as you. Personally, I believe going to classes or other recreational activities that are always at a specific time on a specific day may be even more of a benefit to you if you're not naturally outgoing. Taking some sort of class or engaging in a shared activity FORCES you to put yourself in a situation where you HAVE to interact with other people. The consistency will turn you from being an outcast, to becoming a regular.

I agree that often people don't have the resources to put themselves in situations where they can transition from being an outcast in a social setting, into a regular. Maybe financial constraints, or physical constraints are holding them back. But, the "Mere Exposure Effect" is a real phenomenon. The more "familiar" you become to those who become more "familiar" with you leads to a natural preference towards those individuals. You really cant become familiar to others unless you're around them regularly.

 

[Khastle]

All in all, it's all about just finding that balance yknow? These self-improvement gurus need to stop this stigma that going to the pub or partying with your friends on a Friday night is a bad thing. Yes you will spend way more than you intended, yes you will feel shit the next day, but guess what? You've done something social, you haven't stay stuck in your room, it will show to people you actually have a social life and people respect that, just be sure to manage it well and actually have the funds to back it. I'm so grateful man I sucked it up and worked tirelessly stacking bricks over the summer so not only could I live comfortably at university but keep the Mariana Bay up too (as server costs do eat away at you haha) as yeah being able to fund the lifestyle has helped me a lot socially, just yeah find that equilibrium, let loose a little, and yeah just don't let people think you're a socially inept autistic wetwipe.

 

[clover]

Im not sure your situation at the moment but I would try to take any opportunity to make your youth worth it .

I'm trying, eventually, once I grind out school and work.

 

[MemoryHead 記念頭部]

Uh, have you seen females lately? Pass

 

[ThirdyAughtSix]

Uh, have you seen females lately? Pass

 

[kanpai]

tbh alcohol was what saved me from being a loser, it really helps break the ice.
I went from being 17 without friends or any real connections since I left school at 12 years old, but after I started drinking and forcing myself to go to social events I started to really come out of my shell and just repitition of it lead to me becoming the least self-conscious retard possible. even without alcohol *
You wont find friends in a nightclub but I used to just invite people around to have a few beers i.e neighbours, coworkers etc it worked wonders to just meet people.

 

[AshenMan]

tbh alcohol was what saved me from being a loser, it really helps break the ice.
I went from being 17 without friends or any real connections since I left school at 12 years old, but after I started drinking and forcing myself to go to social events I started to really come out of my shell and just repitition of it lead to me becoming the least self-conscious retard possible. even without alcohol *
You wont find friends in a nightclub but I used to just invite people around to have a few beers i.e neighbours, coworkers etc it worked wonders to just meet people.

ZAMEEEEE!!!

 

[nagolpeso]

Just go outside and do things. You'll meet people.